Saturday, February 2, 2013
Funny How A Blog Title Can Go From A Joke To Being Real!!!!
well i started this 3years or so ago and i have not updated this in quite some time...i have not updated this in a long time...i guess that i thought things were going well, or maybe i just reverted some much that i forgot about it, or may be the real and honest reason is that i am just plain Lazy!!!! yea i guess that is the one... well that is gonna change at least today anyway..
time for an update...for those of you wondering karma is real and she has a way of always coming back to knock my dick in the dirt when i seem to have things going my way...as i am sure you have already surmised yes i am still fat maybe not as fat but still quite pillowy...i have come to the conclusion that i will never be thin...and my pipe dream of being a metro sexual suave man...well that has gone to the wasteside also...you know thinking about it fat people need love too. and i happen to be one of them...thank god for my beautiful wife for showing me that...now that being said i am down to 385 to 390lbs and still have a dream of getting down to 300 to 325lbs...it will happen...maybe now will be the time since i have nothing else going on right now...
about that last part "nothing else going on"...yes i am unemployed yet again...not sure how this happened...about 6 months i made a complete change in my work ethic...i got the opprotunity to change my career and go into management of a telemarketing company...i was going to be my big shot at a career and moving up and showing what i was cable of...well like everything else...i should say that but needless to say it did not work out...someone was brought in over me that did not like or get a long with me...now i am not saying that my past i havebeen a model employee, but can honestly say that i did give it my all...shit i even got suspended for being insubordnate...which was a crock of shit..now i have will admit to those four of you reading this and to god almighty that there were many times whennthis should have happened and i should have terminated but this instance was not one of them...anyway the writing was on the wall, and i started looking then for another job...
so on november first i am in bed and i feel pain that scares the shit out of me in my chest...so my wife and i go to the er and i get admitted for emergency gall bladder removal...when i came back to worrk i went to talk to the owner of the company and explained the situation that is was not going to work out for me there...he said that he understood and there might be a chance to go back to my old position as a collector in his other company...i expressed my graditude and explained that i had already put in an application at a different company with a payraise and unlimited commisions opprotunity...he said that he understood and that was ok...i told him that i did not have the job yet and would let him know when i found out...just so happens i gat the email confirming my hiring that afternoon...so the next day i caught the owner outside right when pulled in to work...i informed him that i did get the job and that i was going to turn in my notice that day...he told me congats and said that i would be welcome back at anytime...i thanked him for everything and said that i was still planning to see him for thanksgiving...he said that was the plan...
that was wendsday week before thanksgiving...so i have a few weeks off before i start my new job and on friday before the holiday i get a call from the guy that i was supposed to spend the holiday with and got informed that he had to disinvite me and my family because his family was upset for what i had done with my job...now dont get the wrong idea i hold no hard feeling towards them for this decision i kinda understand it i was and still just really upset and hurt about it...i guess looking back i should have seen karma starting to raise her bitch hand getting ready to lay the smackdown on me...
so i get past it and get ready to start my new adventure at my new job...it is at a collection agency working student loans...i go in ready and willing to learn and make a shit ton of money...i start at the end if november...i am scared nervous excited all rolled into one bundle of nerves ...i go thru training and get on the floor...i struggle but i feel that i am fighting the good fight and making progress...more time goes on annd i notice that i am still struggling...so i start to have thoughts that maybe this is not a good fit for me...i decide to call my old job to put out a feeler to see about the possibility of me returning...the director said that he would get back to me...oh by the way this was monday jan 14th...i go back and forth if this was for me when on wend jan 16th i called in the office at 730 am and they informed that it was not wokring for them either and let me go...
time for an update...for those of you wondering karma is real and she has a way of always coming back to knock my dick in the dirt when i seem to have things going my way...as i am sure you have already surmised yes i am still fat maybe not as fat but still quite pillowy...i have come to the conclusion that i will never be thin...and my pipe dream of being a metro sexual suave man...well that has gone to the wasteside also...you know thinking about it fat people need love too. and i happen to be one of them...thank god for my beautiful wife for showing me that...now that being said i am down to 385 to 390lbs and still have a dream of getting down to 300 to 325lbs...it will happen...maybe now will be the time since i have nothing else going on right now...
about that last part "nothing else going on"...yes i am unemployed yet again...not sure how this happened...about 6 months i made a complete change in my work ethic...i got the opprotunity to change my career and go into management of a telemarketing company...i was going to be my big shot at a career and moving up and showing what i was cable of...well like everything else...i should say that but needless to say it did not work out...someone was brought in over me that did not like or get a long with me...now i am not saying that my past i havebeen a model employee, but can honestly say that i did give it my all...shit i even got suspended for being insubordnate...which was a crock of shit..now i have will admit to those four of you reading this and to god almighty that there were many times whennthis should have happened and i should have terminated but this instance was not one of them...anyway the writing was on the wall, and i started looking then for another job...
so on november first i am in bed and i feel pain that scares the shit out of me in my chest...so my wife and i go to the er and i get admitted for emergency gall bladder removal...when i came back to worrk i went to talk to the owner of the company and explained the situation that is was not going to work out for me there...he said that he understood and there might be a chance to go back to my old position as a collector in his other company...i expressed my graditude and explained that i had already put in an application at a different company with a payraise and unlimited commisions opprotunity...he said that he understood and that was ok...i told him that i did not have the job yet and would let him know when i found out...just so happens i gat the email confirming my hiring that afternoon...so the next day i caught the owner outside right when pulled in to work...i informed him that i did get the job and that i was going to turn in my notice that day...he told me congats and said that i would be welcome back at anytime...i thanked him for everything and said that i was still planning to see him for thanksgiving...he said that was the plan...
that was wendsday week before thanksgiving...so i have a few weeks off before i start my new job and on friday before the holiday i get a call from the guy that i was supposed to spend the holiday with and got informed that he had to disinvite me and my family because his family was upset for what i had done with my job...now dont get the wrong idea i hold no hard feeling towards them for this decision i kinda understand it i was and still just really upset and hurt about it...i guess looking back i should have seen karma starting to raise her bitch hand getting ready to lay the smackdown on me...
so i get past it and get ready to start my new adventure at my new job...it is at a collection agency working student loans...i go in ready and willing to learn and make a shit ton of money...i start at the end if november...i am scared nervous excited all rolled into one bundle of nerves ...i go thru training and get on the floor...i struggle but i feel that i am fighting the good fight and making progress...more time goes on annd i notice that i am still struggling...so i start to have thoughts that maybe this is not a good fit for me...i decide to call my old job to put out a feeler to see about the possibility of me returning...the director said that he would get back to me...oh by the way this was monday jan 14th...i go back and forth if this was for me when on wend jan 16th i called in the office at 730 am and they informed that it was not wokring for them either and let me go...
Sunday, August 14, 2011
"Yah But You Can Change It !!!!" Did You See That Truck That Just Hit Me?
howdy my peeps...or should i say peep?...hope everyone is doing well out there in blog land...i seem to be doing ok...well not really but what am i going to do cry about it...HELL YES...isn't that what this form is for?...so where do i begin...first let me say that yes i am still married...i know it has been a long 3 yes count them 1 2 3 weeks...no i am kidding...i love it...yipee time is flying by...i love you baby...can you get me a drink and a cigar now...hellooooo...
work seems to be the problem right now...now that i am married i seem to be bugging out that i need to be more successful...or at least make some more green...for the last 41yrs i did not care...the ungroomable...now i am not saying that i am ready to be groomed, but i am saying that i need to stop living paycheck to paycheck...shit right now i get paid and i am broke a day or 2 later...it sucks let me tell ya...the problem i am running into is that my daveness from the past keeps getting in the way...whether it is me or my reputation people cant seem to get past it...i gotta get out of my head that i am not being respected...it is my problem i think i am just now realizing that...
so i am at work talking to a good friend micky...i have spent the better part of 2 days crying on his shoulder...i guess that he was getting sick of it...as any sane person would when he popped off and verbally smacked me like his bitch that was not preforming...i told him about this world famous blog...and the first thing he said to me is that i need to stop putting myself down...i guess he was referring to the title...so i was like wow you joke or comment your height...thats when he threw it...the verbal assault from hell..."AT LEAST YOU CAN CHANGE IT"!...those six words knocked the shit out of me...no shit i can change it...wow what a concept...hello my name is david fogleman it is nice to meet you...
i mean really have you ever met me before...i have tried to change that is the whole point of this fucking blog...der...so now lets update my life change that i was so gung hoe on last year...it is official i have put back on and added that weight i lost last year...i knew i would i find it...i just had to keep looking...and get married...this is your fault honey...
well enough crying for today...time to rub some dirt on it and show nothing but elbows and assholes and get the job done...oh yea and watch some football...so to all you out there in blog land be safe and good night and good luck....
work seems to be the problem right now...now that i am married i seem to be bugging out that i need to be more successful...or at least make some more green...for the last 41yrs i did not care...the ungroomable...now i am not saying that i am ready to be groomed, but i am saying that i need to stop living paycheck to paycheck...shit right now i get paid and i am broke a day or 2 later...it sucks let me tell ya...the problem i am running into is that my daveness from the past keeps getting in the way...whether it is me or my reputation people cant seem to get past it...i gotta get out of my head that i am not being respected...it is my problem i think i am just now realizing that...
so i am at work talking to a good friend micky...i have spent the better part of 2 days crying on his shoulder...i guess that he was getting sick of it...as any sane person would when he popped off and verbally smacked me like his bitch that was not preforming...i told him about this world famous blog...and the first thing he said to me is that i need to stop putting myself down...i guess he was referring to the title...so i was like wow you joke or comment your height...thats when he threw it...the verbal assault from hell..."AT LEAST YOU CAN CHANGE IT"!...those six words knocked the shit out of me...no shit i can change it...wow what a concept...hello my name is david fogleman it is nice to meet you...
i mean really have you ever met me before...i have tried to change that is the whole point of this fucking blog...der...so now lets update my life change that i was so gung hoe on last year...it is official i have put back on and added that weight i lost last year...i knew i would i find it...i just had to keep looking...and get married...this is your fault honey...
well enough crying for today...time to rub some dirt on it and show nothing but elbows and assholes and get the job done...oh yea and watch some football...so to all you out there in blog land be safe and good night and good luck....
Saturday, July 30, 2011
One Week Down.... No End In Sight!!!!!!
howdy folks...see i told i was going to back in a flash...it has been 1 week and 23 mins of marriage bliss for me...yipee...i think...no it is gr8...i just need to keep telling myself that...hey i got a magic bullet out of the deal and a great dinner at papadeauxs last night...thanks roo...and thank you meemaa for the magic bullet awesome from what i hear...
to tell you the truth i have been scared to death this week...i mean really if i am homeless and living in an airport who do i hurt myself...but now there is someone else that i will be bringing down when i self destruct...not sure how to deal with this...i have talked to my person and they i mean he assures me this is normal...ok i hope so...
just wanna say how excited i am that this month is over...i did not realize what a distraction getting married can be...even if you do it on short notice...it ruined my month at work made no money, but i did pick up a bride that went grocery shopping by herself...yipee i never have to go again...my life is complete...ok i might have to go again sometime in the future...i mean i am gonna miss riding the motorized carts...so i went to my boss to schedule a meeting for next week sometime...i need to find what he expects for someone to move into management...because being a collector is not cutting it for me...i know what to do, how to tell you to do it, but cant seem to do it myself...you know the old adage those who cant coach...well thats me...
so i am still fat...need to start on that again...yea right i am married now she is locked into the deal...so why try...he he...anyway thats all for this week...time to turn my attention back to the d-backs game which they are winning right now and they need my support...for the rest of you out the remember be safe GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK.....
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Well This Is Not Working Out For Me....Lets Get Married!!!!!!!!!!
howdy folks...i know it has been a long time...i told you a year ago that i always revert to the dave mode at some time...try as i might it always ends the same way...oh well...i guess pixie at the woman's gym was right...i do need therapy...
so i could go on and cry about how i am still fat, still broke, still driving a broke down truck (scratch that last thing i love rammy)...no i am not going to do it...i am not going to waist your time anymore with that crybaby insecure bullshit...cause i got a new plan....
her yee her yee...come one come all...gather around for the most... interesting, holy shit, outrageous idea even i could have...wait for it...let it resonate...ok are you ready...well here it comes i david fogleman am going to get m ma marr married tonight...shit i did not think it would come out there for a second...so if you in vegas tonight and are not doing anything stop by the little white chapel about 1 am and we will be there...doing the deed....
get your heads out of the gutter that deed is later at golden nugget...there will be a small cover charge and no cameras please...besides i dont think anyone of you has a lens with wide enough angle for my fat ass...oh by the way happy 40th kevin...may you have another 40 to go....
so time to go find some oxygen i will talk to you soon...as always BE SAFE...GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK... why do i really feel those words right now....
so i could go on and cry about how i am still fat, still broke, still driving a broke down truck (scratch that last thing i love rammy)...no i am not going to do it...i am not going to waist your time anymore with that crybaby insecure bullshit...cause i got a new plan....
her yee her yee...come one come all...gather around for the most... interesting, holy shit, outrageous idea even i could have...wait for it...let it resonate...ok are you ready...well here it comes i david fogleman am going to get m ma marr married tonight...shit i did not think it would come out there for a second...so if you in vegas tonight and are not doing anything stop by the little white chapel about 1 am and we will be there...doing the deed....
get your heads out of the gutter that deed is later at golden nugget...there will be a small cover charge and no cameras please...besides i dont think anyone of you has a lens with wide enough angle for my fat ass...oh by the way happy 40th kevin...may you have another 40 to go....
so time to go find some oxygen i will talk to you soon...as always BE SAFE...GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK... why do i really feel those words right now....
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Kevin Skaff Is A Good Egg!!!!!!! Well Thats What They Tell Me Anyway.
howdy friends...how is life treating you...i hope better than me...mine is going ok i guess, i just seem to be in some kind of funk...cant seem to get out of my own way...so here i pose a question to you out there in the interweb...all 3 of you...how do you get around a 450lb man...i am taking any and all suggestions here...dont worry it is not all that bad..i mean hollie is still here and for some reason that i have yet to comprehend she loves me...all of me...and there is almost a quarter ton of me to love...
work sucks...check that i am coming to the conclusions that i suck and it is just the same...this is part of the funk...ok really it is the real funk....i mean i can not collect my thoughts right now...oh well keep pushing i guess...
update time...yes i have joined yet another gym...this is great...$20 a month...and a new trainer...also alot less expensive...not sure of the results yet...still tring to get that motivation back...well at least i am thinking about it still...right?...well here is some good news...I GOT A NEW TV A 47 INCH VIZIO AND DIRECT TV FULL PACKAGE ALL THE SPORTS AND EVERYTHING FOR $12 A MONTH...now re reading that last statement over again i might never leave the house again...800 pounds here i come....thanx honey it is all your fault...i would have never had this choice with out you...i love you...
now lets take a moment to talk about the one, the only, the awesome, the swab, the debonair, the extremely handsome dare i say sexy...no...yea ok...KEVIN SKAFF...he is a mans man...a man most yearn to be like...some one to look up too not just because he is tall but because he is tall...a great collector and friend...take the time and talk to him if you get that opportunity...
well my dinner is ready and i have to go now...so remember be safe..live large or fat and enjoy...good night and good luck.....
work sucks...check that i am coming to the conclusions that i suck and it is just the same...this is part of the funk...ok really it is the real funk....i mean i can not collect my thoughts right now...oh well keep pushing i guess...
update time...yes i have joined yet another gym...this is great...$20 a month...and a new trainer...also alot less expensive...not sure of the results yet...still tring to get that motivation back...well at least i am thinking about it still...right?...well here is some good news...I GOT A NEW TV A 47 INCH VIZIO AND DIRECT TV FULL PACKAGE ALL THE SPORTS AND EVERYTHING FOR $12 A MONTH...now re reading that last statement over again i might never leave the house again...800 pounds here i come....thanx honey it is all your fault...i would have never had this choice with out you...i love you...
now lets take a moment to talk about the one, the only, the awesome, the swab, the debonair, the extremely handsome dare i say sexy...no...yea ok...KEVIN SKAFF...he is a mans man...a man most yearn to be like...some one to look up too not just because he is tall but because he is tall...a great collector and friend...take the time and talk to him if you get that opportunity...
well my dinner is ready and i have to go now...so remember be safe..live large or fat and enjoy...good night and good luck.....
Friday, January 28, 2011
Excuses Are Like A......s! Everyone Has One... And I Seem To Have More Than The Average Fat Man!!!!!!
howdy doody partners...i thought they took down this page from non activity...well what can i say...i guess the demons of my past have caught up to me...now i know you might sitting there wondering what i am talking about...well just hang on a second i am gonna tell ya...this fat man can only type so fast...let me get the big stuff out of the way first...yes i am still with hollie...or more to the point she is still with me...she might thinking about going to therapy though...i wonder if i should be worried...not really but she might...as for the diet...well can you say fat and lethargic?..you guessed it...it is sad to say that i david fogleman am a QUITTER!!! well we all knew it was going to happen just a matter of when...
it is not as bad as it sounds...i mean i am not back over 500lbs yet but if i dont do something soon i will be...i dont know what happened...yes i do, it is hollies fault...that is my knew mantra! when anything goes wrong i blame hollie...god i love her...i mean really isnt that what your significant other is there for?..that and to scratch your back every night before you go nite nites?...just keep the faith though i am still fighting the good fight and vow to get back on track...right after i finish these wings and that pizza and ice cream in the freezer...
so i guess you say she is here to stay...i did not believe it until we got back from lousiana with all her stuff and 2 dogs...so not only i do i have a live in girlfriend, but i have a peeing Pomeranian, a 15yr old deaf heeler, and two kittens...is this what it means to be domesticated?..anyway you remember from previous posts that it has been sometime since i talked to my mommy...yes i was avoiding her because i was am a sissy lala and was scared to talk to her...i thought too much time passed...of course that was not the case and it was all in my head...anyway on the way back from our trip we stopped i had lunch with mommy...acward yes but worth it...and now i talk to her a couple of times a week..what a mammas boy i really must be...so since i saw her i thought what the hell lets try and rebuild the bridge my brother too...what a trip...i guess i have hollie for all this mending...if she was a refugee from anywhere else these things would not have happened...
well i gotta go now..but let me give you a tease for the next installment...can you say I.R.S.? i can now...well until next time as always good night and good luck!!!
it is not as bad as it sounds...i mean i am not back over 500lbs yet but if i dont do something soon i will be...i dont know what happened...yes i do, it is hollies fault...that is my knew mantra! when anything goes wrong i blame hollie...god i love her...i mean really isnt that what your significant other is there for?..that and to scratch your back every night before you go nite nites?...just keep the faith though i am still fighting the good fight and vow to get back on track...right after i finish these wings and that pizza and ice cream in the freezer...
so i guess you say she is here to stay...i did not believe it until we got back from lousiana with all her stuff and 2 dogs...so not only i do i have a live in girlfriend, but i have a peeing Pomeranian, a 15yr old deaf heeler, and two kittens...is this what it means to be domesticated?..anyway you remember from previous posts that it has been sometime since i talked to my mommy...yes i was avoiding her because i was am a sissy lala and was scared to talk to her...i thought too much time passed...of course that was not the case and it was all in my head...anyway on the way back from our trip we stopped i had lunch with mommy...acward yes but worth it...and now i talk to her a couple of times a week..what a mammas boy i really must be...so since i saw her i thought what the hell lets try and rebuild the bridge my brother too...what a trip...i guess i have hollie for all this mending...if she was a refugee from anywhere else these things would not have happened...
well i gotta go now..but let me give you a tease for the next installment...can you say I.R.S.? i can now...well until next time as always good night and good luck!!!
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