Freedom! Let me tell you it is all that it is cracked up to be!

so it happened!!! i am no longer counting to get me around... if i want food i go for it (well i did that before)(bad example anyone who has seen me will understand)... i can go to work with out being attacked by dogs and or it taking an hour and a half to two hours each way.... yes you guessed it i the fat man who has been pissing karma off for 30+ yrs of my life finally had some good fortune.... I GOT A CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!

i got a 96 altima...she was formally known as the cream puff, but now she is in a committed relationship and is a honest car so i renamed her...GLORIA THE CREAM PUFF is her official name...she is straight very clean interior and not bad mileage....cold air nice car all in all....let me tell you it is nice to go some where when you want to....

went to cigar shop on saturday....the stag....nice store but no JOVANNS...but nice all in all...i went in and sat there for a while...tried having conversation but they seem to fucking snobs compared to jv...we were watching college football and this fucking asshole came in and changed the tv to golf.....wtf....golf on college football day? communist...so i did what every self respecting jovannian would do...i left...fuck them the search continues....

i did notice though that they dont seem to have a very large selection in the stores here and i am not sure why...i guess if i really think about it a bad cigar store with fucking assholes in it is better than no cigar store....hey pops let corky know if he comes down to see his kids i want to see him and introduce him to some people....oh by the way that offer goes to you too...

went to my friends house last night for his kids b-day party...just another phase in the incredible journey that i am on of self humiliation to get back in the good graces of people...it was very very nice though...i did not realise how much i missed being a part of that family...i am not going to fuck that up again...hollie is still talking to me despite my repeated attempts to push her away by questioning her sincerity...it seems to be real for thankfull...i really glad she understands that i am just neurotic....and i love her for that and many other fine qualities she has....

i am going to miss riding the bus with all the quacks though...like the 40 yr old lady going to welding school that wears make up to school...awesome...who cares if you sweating your ass off under a welding helmet...you gotta look nice for the teacher and all...i guess every little bit helps...like i always say (or at least right now) if you have an advantage use it....i wonder... no i cant do that...

well anyway i am my way to go for a ride have a cigar and reflect about what a strange journey it has been for me........

Maybe the clouds arent supposed to be lived in?????

hello there friend it has been while since we have had a chance to talk...whats been going on with you? me alot of shit has been happening....so where were we in this epic saga of dis pare i call mylife...oh yea i remember i was confessing my love for all to hear to hollie...yes that is right i think i am in love and from what she says she can tolerate me tooo...i really dont think it has anything to with the muscle relaxers or the booze...i think she really might like me...i am kidding about the mr and booze ya know...i hope...anyway she is great...it seems all i think about is talking to her...just cant get enough...

i started work last week...working for the man among all his people that at some point in time worked for me...it is hard let me tell you...i love the chance and am not going to screw this up but it is hard...i thought i took care of that fucking pride thing a long time ago, but i guess not because he is a stubborn piece of shit getting his feelings hurt all the time at work...it sucks because i am not supposed to be here i am supposed to be with the man running shit...now i am the shit..on the bottom of his shoe that is...ha ha...no i am just stressing out i am not starting off the way i thought i would...and it is pissing me off...so bad that i got written up 2day....i deserved it.. i did it on purpose.. i guess to get a response...guess what.. i did...and it only took me 6days from the start date...

so you might be wondering how i am getting around...i knew it...well i have been regulated to the phx transit system...the jury is still out on it...most of the announcements are in spanish and i am getting to know my way to work...it only take 1hr 45 min and 3 yes count them 3 different buses...it is not so bad if you make you connection but if you miss it sucks...30mins melting in the 108drg bus stop...wahoo...at least the mornings arent so bad....they keep the buses ice cold which is awesome...

what is it with bus riders...why do they feel compelled to talk about their live in such detail...for instance i missed the bus on indian school coming home one day last week when i got to the stop just in time to see the bus pull away i was left there with this mexican chick...26yrs old 3 kids with cps(nice touch i thought) because she was in an abusive relationship with a drug habit...addicted to meth for the last 2 yrs right...lost house car job whatever...now she is sitting at 35th ave and indian school telling me about her bender weekend and how she praying that she does not get picked to do a ua....nice firstimpression huh...i was tempted to get her # i thought woe what a winner here...thank god for hollie that could of been tragic...

well that was last week this week on the other hand same shit broken down bus attacked by a dog written up...you get the picture...so i guess as high as i was it all had to end...fuck thats a long drop quick...thank god me being fat so i can bounce.......