Passion That's What I Am Missing In My Life!!!!!!!!

trust me it is not as bad as the title sounds...i just dont have anything that i am passionate about in my life...i mean it seems that things are once again turning a new direction for me but there is nothing that has grabbed me and consumed me...i want that i yearn for that...what am i missing...am i to scared to realize it or even to start it...what ever it may be...i dont know...

so enough of the self loathing crybaby shit...i have updates for you...although i seem pretty good at the oh me oh my bullshit if i do say so myself...seems to me that i have learned more in the last 3 months than i have learned in the previous 40yrs...i have learned that i am not a good listener like i thought i was...huh? did you say something?...anyway i have learned that i am also not a very good communicator...not a very good realization when my life job is all about communication...oh well...

i am still living in sin...and i so enjoy it...i mean really whats not to like...i have clean boxers and socks when ever i need them...and if there was food in the house i might even get a meal or two...but that is my bad...i just dont make enough money...or haven't been..once again that seems to be turning too...wahoo...

as far as the life change aka diet and workout plan...well how do i put this...hummm...well dont be disappointed but i have stop going to the gym...yes it is true...and get this shit i have managed to still loose a few pounds...i guess my # is down to about 432 to 434 lbs...that is still a long way away from the goal of 300 but it great to know that i am still on the right path...despite what jenfer says...

so tomorrow is pay day thank god...because i am not as flush as i once was...i mean i still have the two accounts and all...one has .70 in it and the other has .80...for a grand total of $1.50...well at least tomorrow i might be able to get back to zero...yipeeee...

so here i sit on a sunday night watching jersey shore on the ever vigilant quest to learn more about relationships..like if you buy a girl a watch for upwards of $500 you are her boyfriend...dam i have not done that yet...nor do i have the zing to do it...does that mean i am not boyfriend material...oh my god i am now so nervous...i also have to admit that i just watched letters to juliette...and to top it off i watched it during the colts giants game...man what does that say about me...well i guess it time for me to go reflect more if you have a comment dont be shy let me know...and as usual GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK!!!!